A weekend story

Since we work ALL day long through the week, we feel pretty tuckered on the weekend.   It is kind of shocking though, especially for our kids, to go so hard all week and then suddenly stop.   They feel a sudden sense of boredom because they have gone full throttle and then have nothing to do.   Their parents on the other hand, would like to just rest.   We thought that this weekend we should get out and about a little bit and change what the weekend felt like so that we didn't have to deal with cabin-fever. 
Well, sometimes you can have some good intentions. 
We thought that we would have lunch and then try to drive around the island.   We have ventured west and south from our place (we on living on the north tip of Penang), but haven't made a loop yet and want to see some more.   We headed north and talked about where to have lunch.   We picked a food stall near the beach instead of opting for American fast food.   We had a big lunch for five for $16.  It was pretty delish.   Then we walked down to the beach to see the tourists taking part in water sports.  We watched some para-sailers take off and land and saw a little bit of "Bali" jammed into a small piece of beach front (water sports, massage, hair braiding, etc.).   
We had parked in the lot attached to the beach.   When we got back to the car, it inexplicably would not start.   We both looked at each other with consternation and some suspicion because our little toaster-of-a-car has been running fine since we have arrived.  Casey would turn the key and nothing would happen.   We had the parking attendant and a couple of the water sports guys come up and make suggestions, but no one offered to call anyone for us.   The parking attendant told Casey he had "no spark" and Casey said, "Oh, ok...is that because you have had this happen before?"   The man didn't know how to respond.  Later, while Casey was under the car the parking attendant came up and asked Chase, "Oh, is your Dad a foreman?"  (mechanic?)  After some tightening and double checking of everything he could see/do within and under the car, it started up again.   We decided to head home just to be sure everything was okay and to be certain we would not get stranded again.   So far, all is well.

In our discussion on the way home, we determined it is pretty likely that someone tampered with our "Mystery Machine".   We remembered that the parking attendant had come down to the restaurant while we were eating and went in the back to talk to someone.  Ryan also noticed that he was watching us the whole time that we were dealing with the car.   At no time did he or anyone else offer some assistance (that would cost a lot of money)--which we expected-- but maybe that didn't happen because Casey immediately started work on the car.  We reminded our kids to be watchful because friends have had stuff stolen out of their car while they are distracted with fixing something broken by someone.
We learned too that maybe those parking lots near touristy places aren't the best place to go.  It is probably better to park and walk from a store lot or park on public streets.   In a lot where you pay an attendant, there is a greater chance for tampering.  
We are not sure when we will venture out again because there are political rallies this weekend and we have been advised to stay close to home.   But when we do, we'll have learned a lesson.  

A New Adventure

Our family is off on a new adventure!  

Do you want to know where we are? 

Yes, that red star shows the island of Penang, right off the west coast of the peninsula of Malaysia.  It is very close to the large island of Sumatra (one of Indonesia's large islands). 

Here are some facts about Penang:

• It is the food capital of Malaysia (some people journey here just to eat!)
• It is the Malaysian state with the highest population density
• It is the most developed and most economically important states in the nation
• It is the state with the greatest population of ethnic Chinese
• It is a very diverse state with a great percentage of Chinese, Malay, and Indian

It is amazing place to live and is much more modern than where we were before.  It is a different culture and way of life than we are used to, so it will take some adjustment.  Malay is similar to Indonesian, but not exactly the same.  We can read and understand all signs (even though they use words in a way we would not).  They understand us okay, but sometimes, when they speak quickly, we have a hard time understanding them.  

What are we doing here?
We are going to be serving at:

 

 

You can learn more about the place where we will be at:  www.dalat.org
Casey will be the facilities director, Sharon will be teaching and the boys will be going to school there!  That's why we are here and we are excited about where God has led us.

It's a beautiful place...we hope you will come visit :).  We will try to share more on this blog about what life is like here and what we're doing.   We've done a little bit of exploration, but have a lot more to do.  There is a lot to see and experience in Penang and in the country of Malaysia. 

 

I think its fair to say we love living on tropical islands :) 

 

Bernhardt Update

We've been back in Indonesia for almost 9 months now.  It is hard to believe!  Time flies when you're having fun or when you're busy I guess. 

I guess you could describe life here as life anywhere else--you have your ups and your downs.  There are good days and there are tough days.  There are days when you are homesick for things in America or the people you love there.  There are days when the culture here makes you want to pull out every single hair on your head.  There are days when the noise, traffic, dirt and the pollution make you want to leave and find a quiet uninhabited island.   Then there are days when you are astonished by the beauty that you see.  You think about the funny and amazing friends God has given you who have become like your "family".  You give thanks for the skills you are learning about how to relate to others.  You also realize that the tough things you are walking through can be good lessons for every single member of your family.  You feel thankful that God is present, God provides, and God has a purpose. 

Casey is still adjusting to his position and his responsibilities.  He is enjoying working with the Indonesian staff.  My classes are going okay.  I work with some amazing teachers.  I find that while Casey's Indonesian is improving, mine is worsening, because I do concentrate on using English a lot with my coworkers and students (to help improve theirs).  It is an interesting phenomenon.  The boys are ready for summer vacation I think.  Ryan and Niko both have deadlines approaching (end of next month) to finish their online courses.  It will be challenging to press on and do well until the end.  They feel pretty burned out.   They did start playing basketball at school two times a week.  They may not be able to join games, but they are practicing their skills and are getting some exercise.  It is going fairly well.   Chase is doing fine and is enjoying his friends at school.  He is using more Indonesian there and his teacher praises him.  She says even when he doesn't understand, he still wants to try.  She told me that he was responsible to hand back papers and didn't know all his classmates names (there are 26 kids) and he figured out on his own to look at the label on their backpacks so he could return their papers :). 

We would appreciate your prayers as we battle some flu bugs and also try to help our kids adjust to relationships here.  Please do keep praying for some good friends for them.  That has been a big challenge.   We are so thankful for your encouragement, love and support.  We'd love to hear from you!

Blessings,
the Bernhardt

At Pita and Okik's wedding at the end of December

Car in the flood outside of school

Ry holding a sea turtle in Bali

Brothers at play

Bernhardt Update- February 2014

I realize with this note that I have not sent out an update for over a month now.   I had great intentions to send an update once a month, but I dropped the ball!   I guess life happened.    J

Here is the news for each person in our family, since our last update:

Casey-  Casey survived a week with the kids when I was in the States.  Everyone was alive and in one piece when I returned.   Over the last few weeks, Casey has been officially given the job of “manager” over the staff at our school.   The areas which he focuses on are security, maintenance and grounds, and the cleaning crews.  Please pray for wisdom for him as he tries to make changes and train and encourage the workers while keeping a positive spirit.    On two occasions we have dealt with very heavy rains, which flooded the roads near the school and made it impossible to get to/from the building.  We also have dealt with a volcanic eruption over 130 miles away which caused ash to fall in our city.  He has had to consider how the staff should respond to those issues to help protect the students.  Although he has faced challenges in this work, he has continually noted how much he enjoys being here and how he feels like he is doing what God has called him to do.

Sharon- I was able to make a quick trip to the States.  I was really grateful for the opportunity to make the trip and to spend that time with my Mom and Dad.  Jet lag really made me rather useless as a help to my Mom, which I felt bad about, but I was really grateful to spend some time with my Dad.  I also got to see my grandfather twice and some friends who used to be in Indonesia.  It was not an easy trip for all of us, but I am very thankful that I was able to do it.   I am staying busy, but then I wonder if there was ever a time in my life that I haven’t been?  J  I am still teaching 2 classes to 7^th graders (Geography and History) and two English classes to the teachers.  I also am reading to 11 elementary classes once a week.  Those are my responsibilities on campus.  I also help prepare Ryan and Niko’s school work every day, so that they can make sure they get through their “homeschool” assignments.  I have worked (and am still working) on some writing assignments and have 20 online students for Earth Space Science.  We won’t have a helper, so I am also cook and cleaner.  I do feel that often my life involves “juggling”, but I am thankful for the opportunities I have been given.   I am involved in a ladies Bible study and what started with just two people has now grown to 7!  That has been amazing.  I also have really enjoyed learning more about God and His word as I’ve practiced verse mapping.  God has really been encouraging me in my walk with Him and I feel very blessed.   I am thankful for the lessons He has been teaching me and I long to learn even more.

Ryan-  Ryan stepped out of the norm recently with the reluctant urging J of his parents and took a school trip to Bali.  It was a great experience for him.  He came home with so many stories about the places he visited and the things he saw.  He also got to spend more concentrated time with his classmates and teachers, which really helps.  Since he only pops in for class occasionally, he really needed an experience like this to help build relationships.   Next month he will hopefully get to start playing some basketball at school and piano lessons.  We are hoping that will work out for them.  

Niko- Niko has probably had the most challenging time with making friends.  He has met some kids who he thinks are “nice” but he too has struggled to find when to talk with them, get to know them and spend time with them.   I think that the cultural differences and the situation that we are in all contribute to making this more difficult.  We would ask for your prayers for him.  We hope that he will be able to start basketball and piano as well this coming month.

Chase- Chase is doing well.  He complains about school every day, but when we pick him up, he talks happily about his friends.  He really enjoys playing with other kids.  In fact, it is starting to be a little more challenging to take him to class with me each day (after his school is over).  He would rather distract and play with my students that do something else.  This is a little more stressful this semester, and I am hoping I can consider creative things that he can do that will not disturb my students.  Unfortunately I don’t teach any of my classes when he is in class, which may be something I try to request in the future J.   He has adjusted well to life here and can (and does) befriend anyone.  It is a great gift!

We have come across so many needs here.  The boys and I were able to head to an orphanage between Semarang and Salatiga and we spent a morning there painting.  I have known the head of the orphanage for awhile, and he helped me arrange service projects for students in the past.  It was good to visit them.  They definitely have many needs.  It tugged on my kid’s heart strings to see kids who have been abandoned and don’t have families to care for them.   It was a good experience for them to get out of “themselves” and focus on others. I was really proud of how hard and how cheerfully they worked for and played with the kids.  I was able to lead my current students on a trip too, to a home for street kids.  Hopefully we can occasionally provide some support to them too.  There are so many in need and I hope and pray that we will look for ways God wants to use us to help others. 

This semester for our school will go until mid-June.   Indonesian school breaks are very short!!   Casey will have one week of vacation and the boys and I will have a month off for school holiday.  It will go quickly!   Casey and I will celebrate 20 years of marriage this summer, so we are hunting for where to go (and what to do with the kids J) for some of his week off.  A friend of mine from my junior high years at boarding school may also make the trek this way during our school break, which I am excited about.  It may be bad to say when it is only February, but we are already looking forward to a change of pace and the rest and relaxation.   

Thank you for your prayers and for your encouraging support.  It means so very much to us.  We know that we could not be here, doing what we are doing, without you by our sides.   We would love to hear from you if you have the opportunity.

Blessings,

the Bernhardts

Very important mail or contributions should be sent to:  PO Box 2479, Anderson, IN, 46018

Please do not send financial gifts through the mail to our address in Indonesia.  We have received some mail and packages, but it takes a long time.  Please always put customs value at $0 (because it is not for resale) and use lots of packing tape if you want to send a package J.   We can get letters here and sure would not mind.  The mailing address is: Jl. Puri Anjasmoro L15/2, Semarang, 50142, Jateng, Indonesia

December Update

We have wrapped up our first semester of work at Tri Tunggal School in Semarang.  Exams got finished, grades were turned in, and Christmas services and parties were attended.  Now the teachers are “off”, but Casey is still going in this break for a few hours each day during the week because projects are going on which the staff are working on.  

Ryan, Niko and Chase finished out the semester well.  Ryan earned two A’s, one B and a C on his online courses.  Math was the toughest.  Hopefully next semester he can improve that score.  He has to work hard and work independently, but he is doing a great job.  Next semester he will begin receiving grades for his classes which he takes with the 7^th graders at Tri Tunggal too.  Niko reached 40% completion on all of his online course work (which was the goal).  He got mostly all A’s on his Tri Tunggal courses.  Chase did a great job at school.  His teacher praised him for always trying, even when it is tough.  He asks questions and tries his best.  He is doing so much better socializing with his friends.  There are a few things to pray about for the boys.  Please do pray for Ryan and Niko as they seek to build friendships.  That has been tough for them.   On Jan 6-8, Niko is going to a “friendship camp” with his class.  They are going to spend the night out of town, and that will be very different for him.  He will be in Salatiga, which is about 2 hours from us—so still on the same island J.    Ryan will be going to Bali with his class in February, which involves flying to another island!  So, you can pray for his parents in regards to that trip.  He doesn’t really want to go, but it would be good for him to be with his class and get to know them and also be able to experience Bali.

This last weekend we also got to experience the wedding of our good friend Pita.  She has been waiting and praying for God to bring the right person into her life, and it was so exciting to share this celebration with her.  We were at wedding events for two full days.  I have not made a Facebook album of photos yet, but will work on it when I return.  On the first day there was a traditional event surrounding preparing the bride for the wedding and then in the evening was the service called an “engagement” and the groom’s family brought gifts (dowry) for the bride.  There was a prayer which was conducted by a pastor.  On the next day we spent hours getting made up and getting dressed before a service at church and then a reception where Casey and I were greeters with other family members.  We really felt honored to be a part of the ceremony.   Our friends are now on their honeymoon on the island of Lombok.  They spent some time with us Christmas morning and we took them to the airport for their trip.   We are praying that God will work through their lives and marriage and that He will bless them.   We are so happy for them. 

I will be leaving tomorrow to fly to the States for a very short week.  I get to spend the time with my Mom and Dad and I’m really thankful for that.  It is a short time, but I didn’t feel like I could/should leave my boys for any longer than that and I really wanted to spend Christmas with them.   Please pray for safety on my journey and for the boys and Casey to have a good week.  They can’t travel far to do much since Casey will be working, but hopefully they can still do some fun things together.  

We all dive back into school on January 6^th, and as I look at the calendar, it will be a very busy first week.  Please pray for rest and recuperation this week as we live through a different and quieter schedule (even if part of it for me involves sitting in airplanes J).    

We love you all and miss you.  We are thankful for the opportunity we have been given to live and minister in this place.  We are thankful for your prayers and support. 

Much love,  

Casey, Sharon, Ryan, Niko and Chase

For support or financial gifts please send it to us at:  Casey & Sharon Bernhardt, PO Box 2479, Anderson, IN, 46018-2479 (through Madison Park Church of God)

You can write us personally at:  Casey & Sharon Bernhardt, Jl. Puri Anjasmoro L15/2, Semarang, 50744, Jateng, Indonesia                                 

We have received mail but it takes a few weeks.  We also have received a package.  We just had to go to the central post office to pick it up.  Please let us know if you send anything, so we can be looking for it. 

 

November Update

On Facebook we have seen so many comments about yummy delicious food and we’ve seen pictures of people celebrating with family. Although we can’t do either of those things this Thanksgiving, we also have read people’s comments about what they are thankful for. THAT we can do, and THAT is what Thanksgiving is really all about. I mean, the “holiday” is one that is particular to the U.S. and it has certain traditions tied to it (eating turkey, eating a lot of yummy delicious food, watching parades, watching football, etc.). But, it is believed that when that holiday started, it was about giving thanks. And, after all, that is the name of holiday. So, can we still “celebrate” the holiday even when we don’t have a turkey, all the trimmings, and family to celebrate with? Thanksgiving of course, is not an Indonesian holiday. One of my friends said, “Indonesians celebrate Thanksgiving ALL of the time!” I think that what we are all supposed to do. As Paul says in Philippians 4:4-9, “Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” So, no matter what situation we face, we should always give thanks!




We are really thankful for so many things. We are thankful that God has brought us here and has provided for us. We are thankful for the school we work at and for the work He has given us. I am still teaching two classes (Geography and History for 7th grade). I also teach the teachers English and I read story books to grades 1-6 once a week. Besides that I try to supervise Ryan and Niko’s online course work and I have some students in online Earth Science for Sevenstar. We have still not chosen to hire a helper, so I am still the house-hold cook and cleaner. I am thankful that I don’t get too many people dropping in on me unannounced! I also have been meeting with friends for Bible study once a week. There were 3 of us, and now there are 6, so that is pretty cool. I am thankful for those amazing women and for the encouragement they are to me.




Casey is really busy now. He felt frustrated when he started, because he was not given a lot of work. He felt bad, wondering what he was supposed to be doing. They admitted that they were “easing” him in, and now that his plate is fuller he understands their caution more and is thankful. He does a lot of mentoring of the directors for the staff side of things (security, janitorial, maintenance). There have been some issues with theft he has weighed in on and he has tried to help with their traffic mess. There is a lot to do. He is really enjoying it now that he is busier and he really does enjoy getting to know the people we work with.




Ryan has been working on hard on his four online classes and is doing pretty well with it. It is not easy and it takes a lot of time. He is also taking eight classes with 7th grade. He will not be graded for all of them though. He is auditing Javanese, Indonesian and Mandarin. He hasn’t really connected with anyone yet socially. He does keep in touch with two of his good friends in Anderson and enjoyed Skyping with them.




Niko has had some struggles. He has such a sensitive heart, that he has had a hard time when kids say things or laugh either in class or when he walks to Casey’s office in another building. Some kids who are in the “regular” school (not in all English classes) have called him names and have thrown things at him. We have met with the school administration about it and we have also guarded his coming to/fro from his building to Casey’s more closely. His classmates have said sorry and have explained that they were not making fun of him. It is hard when he does not understand the language very much and then always assumes they are making fun of him. He is doing well on juggling his work although sometimes he and I argue about it. He wants to develop a friendship with a boy in 5th grade who is in the other class. Please pray that they have an opportunity to get to know each other and spend some time together.




Chase is doing well. He loves to watch cartoons and play with the neighbor kids across the street. He might be learning Indonesian the fastest. His brothers have lessons at school once a week, but his preschool is not in English AND he plays with kids that don’t have English. He likes to watch cartoons, go bike riding, and play soccer with the neighbor kids.




We have been going to Salatiga around 2 times a month. It has been fun to spend time with people there. The biggest reason we are going is for the boys to do karate with Pak Bowo. They really like their lessons. Even Chase can’t wait for karate! The drive is pretty exhausting however. We are praying that they will open a new section of the toll road soon. That should make the drive a lot easier on us. We will be able to skip a large portion of the one main BUSY road. The roll road also goes through some gorgeous jungle, the kind of which you could never imagine still exists on this heavily populated island! I was also able to make a quick trip to Makassar in South Sulawesi this month. One of the young single gals we met at the college English fellowship in Salatiga got married. I was able to attend her wedding and reception. I was really thankful for the opportunity to attend that celebration.




For the coming month we will be wrapping up the first semester at school with exams and Christmas activities. We will also have the wedding of one of dearest friends here. Our friend Pita will get married at the end of December. We are excited about that. On the 22nd, Casey and I will dress up in traditional Javanese clothes and will be party of the reception committee. Pit is definitely like family to us and we love her very much. We are excited about her future with Okik, who is a really great guy. We are thankful that the Lord brought them together. Then after Christmas, I will head to the States for a week with my Mom and Dad. I can’t wait to spend time with my Dad---caring for him, reading to him, and napping in the same room with him. I also will try to do a little shopping for some things we need while I am there.




Thanks for your loving concern for us and for your thoughts and prayers. We are thankful for YOU. It is a different feeling for us to not be here under an organization. Although we were the only people in Indonesia for many years with GM of the Church of God, we did feel that we were part of a bigger body. Now we feel more “alone” in our work. We are so thankful that we have congregations who are walking alongside us. We are thankful that you are here for us, and we would love to hear from you. Thanks for blessing and encouraging us.




May God richly bless you,




Sharon, Casey, Ryan, Niko and Chase









For support or financial gifts please send it to us at: Casey & Sharon Bernhardt, PO Box 2479, Anderson, IN, 46018-2479 (through Madison Park Church of God)




You can write us personally at: Casey & Sharon Bernhardt, Jl. Puri Anjasmoro L15/2, Semarang, 50744, Jateng, Indonesia




We have received mail at this address, but it takes several weeks. We do not know how packages would fare, because we have not received one yet. If there is something you want to send other than a letter, please contact us by email first to discuss the best way to send it. Thanks!

Diversity

Torajan Home: http://fineartamerica.com/featured/toraja-architecture-charuhas-images.html

I know that there are pockets of great diversity in the United States, but many places don't seem all that diverse.  I have known mentally that Indonesia is diverse, especially when one considers that there are approximately 400-500 different people groups.  The post-colonial government has exercised phenomenal control, binding these diverse cultures together under one government and a single language.  When I give that some thought, it is a pretty incredible endeavor.   On Java you meet people from lots of different places, but they settle into life on Java pretty quickly and sometimes it is hard to separate them from the local Javanese.  Plus, the Javanese are the dominant people group so their culture prevails here.

This weekend I took the quickest trip ever to Sulawesi.  I am sad because my visit was so short and I really didn't get to see much of their rich deep culture.  I am also VERY sad because I forgot my camera (so I have snatched a picture of a native house from the internet).  My friend lives in the capital city of the island of Sulawesi (Makassar, also known as Ujung Pandang).  It feels so far away, but it really wasn't.  My first flight to east Java took 30 minutes.  My second flight to Sulawesi took a little over an hour.  Then I was there.

It was still an island obviously.  It was still jungle like, but it seemed drier.  I also was only in one place, but didn't notice a great elevation around me anywhere.  But as I hopped in a taxi and got started down the road, it just "felt" different. It is kind of hard to explain.  I could speak the taxi driver's language, but his accent was so different that he was a little hard to understand.  The people did not seem as friendly overall.  There weren't as many smiling faces.  The majority religion of Indonesia also had a very strong presence.  There are many covered women and a more serious feeling in that regard.  In that way it felt a little depressing and oppressed.

Then, suddenly, I ran smack into yet another culture.  My friend is from Toraja, which I heard is about 500km from the city of Makassar.  It has a very different culture.  They are animistic and have rituals with corpses and burial that are intriguing.  Photo blog here.  If you want to read more about Torajan culture, I found more information here.   Maybe one day we'll actually get a chance to travel to Toraja.  It was interesting to step into it for just a tiny glimpse--from an amazingly decorated wedding vehicle, to my friend's decorated home, to a Torajan Christian church, to their stunning wedding costumes and the gorgeous fabrics all the guests were wearing.  The Javanese have their own signature batik, but the Torajan colors and style are uniquely their own.  The language I heard was different and so were their dances and traditions.   I have been reminded of my appreciation for the diversity of this county and a sense of gratefulness for all the amazing people God has created--and for my small little part in this world.

My friend and her new husband, a native of Australia

(P.S.- Another interesting thing this trip did for me, is it gave me a greater appreciation for my island of Java too.  It was nice to visit Sulawesi, but I found out that Java is "home" and for all its frustrations, there are some things I deeply love.)

A Complex Beautiful Heart

I have to admit that I have a very complex relationship with this boy.  He and I rumble a lot.  I feel like I am always struggling to get him to do this, get this done, or not do this or that.  I get so frustrated when he strikes out at his brothers without any provocation.  I also have a hard time with his grumbling.  For example, he fought with his older brother today and he got a "punishment" of losing electronic devices for a week.  After that little episode, I walked him over to his school building, and he complained the entire way there.  I had no success helping him think about what he could do with his time or how he could work things out better with his brother(s).  So, sometimes he just really makes me want to scream.  This happens more with him than with his other brothers, and so it could be our personalities.  It is hard for us to work together.  This homeschooling stuff is so incredibly hard with him. 

But then, I get these beautiful snatches of joy with my son.  This afternoon, as a result this "punishment", he played about 12+games of a card game with me and didn't want to stop.  I loved watching his expression when he beat me, because he didn't pull it off all that often.  I didn't dare bring his attention to how much fun he was having, because I didn't want to spoil it!  

I also love the glimpses I have of his sensitivity.  This boy has a SUPER sensitive heart.  On one stateside visit, the boys witnessed some teens killing some baby ducks by stomping on them.  He cried and cried for hours.  He was heart-broken this week when the baby gecko he caught got away over the weekend and he cried about an Indonesian man calling him "fat".  He is the only one of the three boys who mentions how much it bothers him that he gets stared at (for being white) or laughed at (for reasons he can't understand).  He can't stand it when his brother calls him "stupid", because his heart hurts.  

Last week my middle and youngest boy were with me when we saw a filthy ragged man sitting on the road.  He was not begging or asking for money, but when I saw him, I grabbed some money from my wallet.  I just felt that tug on my heart to respond to him.  I asked my son to give it to him, but he shied away from it and so the youngest boy did.  The man's face just LIT UP, and he had the biggest smile on his face.  It impacted this son.  He saw that expression.  He talked about it for awhile and I could tell that it made an impression on him.  I love that about him.  His heart is beautiful. 

I know this too, because as we packed to move to Indonesia, I found a paper that he had written for school.  It wasn't FOR me, but it was ABOUT me.  When I saw it, it melted my heart.  When I am frustrated with him and when I want to scream, I should read this.  There is no doubt that I love this boy with ALL my heart---

One of my favorite people is my mom.  She is like heaven on earth, when I have a problem she helps me fix it.  She is one of my most favorite people.

I can’t describe how much my mom helps me.  One thing is she helps me with homework and other things I have to do. 

During a hard time I can always count on my mom and when I have a problem I can always tell her and she won’t laugh.  That is why she is the best mom on earth. 

When I read this, it convicts me too.  I read it and think of my negative responses and the frustration I express and wonder, how can you think I'm the best mom on earth, son?  I am thankful that God works through me (in whatever messy state I'm in!) to help my son in the ways that he needs it.  And, I hope and pray that I will become even more sensitive to him and his amazing and beautiful heart. 

Search for Wisdom

Some days it is kind of scary to be a parent, and to try to determine the best course of action for your kids.  We made a decision this week that seems to age me in a millisecond!  For the coming week, Ryan is going to try attending some 7th grade classes at the school we work at.  He is still enrolled in four online classes at the 6th grade level, but will be attending some elective classes at the 7th grade level.
There are quite a few reasons for this decision.  The sixth grade has been a challenging environment for him and we've reached a point where we have been receiving a lot resistance when it is time to go to class.  Also, in January, he would go do his "extra classes" with 7th anyway because 6th won't have any of those classes.  They spend whole 2nd semester preparing for the Indonesian national exam, which our boys won't need to take.
Ryan visited one of my 7th grade classes at the end of this week.  I have to say, it made me feel old.  It also made me feel a little sad, as he takes yet another step away from his younger brothers.  I'm hoping it will be a better environment for him.  I hope he'll make some friends.  I'm hopeful while I'm sad at the same time.  I realized how big this will be for Niko too.  Although they were not in class together and they did not have the same schedule, they were in the same building.  His brother is really moving on to something new and I think Niko is going to feel that loss as he has already felt the loss of his brother growing away from him.
So, for the week, we'll be testing the waters, feeling it out.  And, we hope and pray it is a positive move.  Please pray along with us!

A Special Day

Have you ever looked back at your life, realizing that God chose you specifically for some particular purpose that He had in mind for you?

This a very important week. In a few days, a special boy has a birthday.  I will never forget the day God brought him into my life. I was at home by myself at our house in Kembangarum, in Salatiga.  The phone rang.  When I answered, it was one of my very best friends.  She said that she needed my help.  One of her relatives from out of town had just given birth in Salatiga.  The mother and her young husband already had one son. They felt strongly that they could not keep another baby.  It would be too much for them.  Financially they could already barely provide for their first son. They wanted to leave Salatiga and leave the baby behind. She asked me if I could take the baby.

It was a difficult question to answer.  I am a closet baby lover (I don't "ooooh" and "aaaah" over babies, but I sure love to take care of them.)  Here was a young family in need.  How could I refuse to help?  But, I already had two sons. At that time, quite a few foreign families were looking into adoption.  Some had spent a lot of money and exerted a lot of effort to adopt, then had their hopes dashed. Many heard, "You already have two children, so your family is complete.  You don't need another child." I knew some foreigners were "fostering" but would face having to leave the child behind if/when they had to return to the States.  I knew that would not be best. As much as I like babies, I did not feel compelled to take the child and raise him. But, I understood the situation was difficult.  She wanted to drop the baby off right away.  I asked for a little time to make some calls and see if any of my Indonesian friends were interested in adoption.

One couple I knew wasn't very interested.  I sent a message to another friend and then one of her brother's called me. He started to ask me questions about the situation and about the baby.  Then he said, "Well, you know...just yesterday my brother and sister-in-law asked us to pray for them because they decided to pursue adoption."  Can I honestly tell you, that I felt the shivers run up and down my spine at his words!?  I said, "Friend, I have to tell you...just yesterday, this baby was born!"  I felt completely certain that he was born to be part of their family.

I was swept into a situation of which I have never known the like.  That afternoon, a car pulled up to my gate. Inside was the family with a brand-new baby. I had never met them before.  The young father was driving.  I saw their young son, who definitely appeared to be malnourished.  In the backseat, the young mother was holding her newborn baby.  She was weeping, tears coursing down her cheeks, as she whispered goodbye to her little one.  She trustingly turned over her newborn into the arms of a complete stranger. I think God really prepared me.  I think that if I had let the gravity of her situation really sink in and if I would have imagined myself in her shoes, I might have said, "This is just too hard.  I think you should just keep him."  God didn't let me go there that day, but allowed me to be in the right spirit to act and move in the way He purposed.

(Insert: I must say, through this experience, I have a lot respect and admiration for the courage mothers demonstrate--when they realize that for some reason they cannot keep their child.  Maybe they are single and young and unable yet to parent.  Maybe they know that they can't provide the best life for their child.  Whatever their reason, I deeply respect them.  I can't imagine anything more difficult.)

I carried that precious baby into my house and waited for his "new parents" to arrive.  I had never met them before that day (although I knew other members of their family).  They came into my home and I placed this new baby--their answer to prayer---in their arms.  They were weeping as they saw him and realized this meant instant parenting.  I think they were probably stunned and in awe of God's response too.  They felt anxiety, wondering if the birth mother would change her mind.  They felt anxiety, wondering if the adoption would go through legally since the families were of different faiths.  Despite their worries, they took that baby boy home and started a new chapter in their lives---suddenly, without nine months of preparation---not even 9 hours---!!  They were flung straight into parenting and caring for a baby, with a lot of learning to do along the way.

Over the days ahead they met the birth mother.  They shared their hearts with her and extended their love. The legal part of the adoption sailed right through and their son is completely theirs. As he has grown in stature, it is amazing to me that he bears little physical resemblance to his biological parents. He seems to be, completely, the spitting image of his adoptive father.  They named him "Samuel" because God heard and answered their prayer, just as He heard and answered Hannah's prayer for her Samuel.  God answered immediately for them--right when they prayed, Sam was born into this world---for them, and even looking like them!  I am sorry, but it seems like in this situation, God was showing off a little bit :)

I celebrate this week because it is Sam's birthday. I remembered his birthday even when were in the States and sent him things so he wouldn't forget us!, but now I get to be here in person.  Sam isn't very warm with me.  Maybe it is because I'm a white lady.  Perhaps it is because when he was a wee boy I cut his thick wavy hair for his folks and made him cry big buckets of tears.  Maybe it is because he has some sort of understanding of the role I played in this past. I'm not really sure.  I do know that I was given a very important role at just the right time and I have an important role now. My role is to pray for him as he grows, help provide for him and his parents as I can, and encourage his folks in their ministry and as they raise this young man. I am blessed beyond measure because GOD did something amazing and I got to be a part of it and witness it all go down!

Happy Birthday Sam!  May God bless you each and every day of your life. You--and your parents--are very special to me! 

Newborn Sam and his new parents!

Sam is growing up!

October Newsletter-Finding our Way

Three months ago we landed.  We arrived “home” supposedly.  It was a familiar place full of faces of people we loved.  Some people had moved on and there were new faces.  We moved into a new home in a new city and had to get used to new things, which although were new, weren’t new at the same time!  (Is that confusing, or what?)  We can speak the language, we know where the stores are, we know things about these people and this place---but yet, we don’t because we do live and work in a new environment.  It has been a time of change and transition. 

Initially we felt pretty torn between the ministry we left in Salatiga and the people we love there and the new ministry and people we are getting to know in Semarang.  Slowly that has feeling has dissipated.  We still keep in touch with our friends in Salatiga, but we are leaving more of that behind emotionally.  We see friends from there now and again, but we are building firmer relationships with the people we work with here and are shifting our focus to that.  We had to go through this, for we had to see our friends in Salatiga.  And although that caused tension in our hearts to start with, that feeling is leaving as we develop things here and fall in love with where God has placed us. 

We are all still in transition, including the kids.  We would ask that you remember them as they walk through this journey.  Chase had a rough initial adjustment, but has surprised us all by coming out of that superbly.  He wants to go play in the street with the neighbor kids and is not shy even though their language is different.  He is working on learning the language bit by bit.  He also loves playing with the 7^th graders I teach.  Ryan and Niko are making slower progress.  The schedule they are juggling (some online classes and some at our school) makes it hard for them to get to know the kids well. But, educationally it is the best option for them.  They have met some nice and helpful kids in their classes, but have not gone further in developing friendships.  This is another point of prayer for us.  Both boys have been able to contact some friends in the States via Skype, and we are so thankful for that.    We are thankful for their friends back in Indiana who are not afraid to keep in touch and “stay friends” despite the gap in distance!

Thanks for your prayers.  We really appreciate them!  They are so encouraging to us. 

We will try to keep in touch more about our journey and we’d love to hear from you,
Blessings,

Casey, Sharon, Ryan and Niko

 

Training my Helpers

In Indonesia, many people have house helpers.  In Salatiga, the word we used for a helper was a "pembantu".  Our pembantu would come in at 7am and leave at 3pm, Monday through Friday.  She would clean, cook, do laundry and help me with three amazing boys.  I really did appreciate her help so much.  There were some down-sides to having a helper.  The biggest one was that you had to manage an employee.  I just don't like that aspect.  I don't like confrontation all that much and it was hard when she would do things her own way (and not the way I requested as the person who paid her salary).  I also wasn't a fan of the drama we had sometimes.  Basically, I took the good with the bad, but sometimes there were some really bad moments.  What always stood out the most for me though was the way she took care of my kids, so some of the other things I could put aside and not worry about.

Now we have moved back.  I have found, since living in this town, that there are some different words used here.  In Semarang, a "pembantu" is a helper that actually lives in your home.  We actually have a decent sized, L-shaped room upstairs in the back of our house for a helper to live in.  You have to climb some steep stairs to get up there.  There is also a bathroom outside that would be for a helper.  We have found that you can hire a "pojokan" here which is more of what we really had in Salatiga.  That is a person who comes during the day, as many days as you want to hire her.

This week I actually had two ladies show up at the door.  One was younger than me I think and the other was a wrinkly older woman who was missing a bunch of teeth.  The younger one spoke to me, asking if I wanted to hire a "pojokan" because the older lady wants a job. The older one was really hard to understand, so I am sure that is why the younger one came to speak for her.   I graciously (I hope) said, "No, I'm not ready yet.  Thank you."   I felt bad saying "no", because I know she wants a job and probably needs it.  But, I also don't really want to relinquish my housework to anyone right now.

Believe it or not, even though there is a lot to do, I feel like I don't really want another person in my house.  Although it would be nice to have help with some of the house tasks that I do every day, freeing up my time for teaching and planning, I don't have any interest in the down-sides of having a "pembantu" or "pojokan".  I don't have a lot of interest in training someone.  That might in fact be a little easier in Semarang, because you probably can be more direct in your approach with people in this area.  You don't have to be extra polite and beat around the bush, but you can be straight-forward with people.   But, I just don't feel excited about that.  I also don't want to go through the mess of finding out whether or not a person is honest and trustworthy.  I have had plenty of experiences with dishonesty and I don't relish having to just try out a stranger and see if they are going to steal and cheat.  I also don't really want to  have to deal with the drama that having an employee can bring.  Sometimes they have personal issues that you get drawn into as their employer, and that can be tough and annoying to deal with.

Although I can't say I'm excited about the training required (similar to the down-side mentioned above!), I really want my kids to learn some of these skills and I want them to participate in the house and the things that we need to do to keep things running.  In the past they got an allowance and they had some chores.  However, they would often forget or neglect their chores, but still wanted their allowance.  So, for the past several months (much to their chagrin!), we have just scratched the allowance thing.  Thanks to something on Facebook and adding some tweaking of my own, I'm trying something new this coming week.  I don't know how it will work, but I am hopeful!  The kids have to pick one chore to help me with.  They don't get paid specifically for that one chore.  But then, they can pick more chores to do during the week for pay.   Then I also added a "bonus".  If they don't do their chores, they don't get a bonus.  If they do a passable job on their chore(s) and I have to remind them to do it they get a minimal bonus.  But, if they do a good job on their chore(s) and I don't have to remind them (hound them!) then they will get a bigger bonus.  I really hope this works!  Casey and I already have to get at them every morning to get out the door by 6:30am.  It is so hard in the mornings.  Then I am also bugging them all day to get their online school assignments done.  I don't want one more thing to get at them about!  So, they can earn more if I don't have to do that.   I really hope by making a lot of it optional, that they will be more joyful about what they do.  I'd love it if they just dove in and helped of their own accord, but that doesn't happen very often.  I do want my kids to learn these skills, so for that reason, I must swallow my dislike for training in the household chore training department.  Wish us luck!!  (P.S.  I may have to find a chore I can entrust to Chase.  He was asking me for a job too as the boys were picking out theirs! :))

The Old and the New

It is hard to really organize my thoughts and feelings about our first month in Indonesia.  We have moved to a city of 2 million+ people and have moved into a home in a type of housing addition.   We have started a new job, met new co-workers and students, and have started driving and learning our way around town.  We have found new yummy food and new places to swim and play.   We have set up new schedules and basically a new way of life. 

However, the old way of life here and old relationships have also called us back.   Some of the reunions have been sweeter than I could ever express.   I remember with heart-felt emotion how one of Casey’s guards in Salatiga grasped his hands in a warm shake and then touched his chest with his other hand and said, “I don’t have words (I’m speechless).”   When I met one of my best friends in the world, we just wept and several times she said, “I just can’t believe this.  It’s like I’m dreaming.”   We have also strongly felt the loss of Casey’s close friend, Gono.  We have not been able to see his wife and daughter yet, but feel his loss now so tangibly.  Even now I can hear the sound of his voice and laughter in my head.  He would have been one of the most excited people to have us back in the area. 

There are two other families in Salatiga I have been praying for and was so thankful to see.  The first was a woman named Nina who used to be a guard for Casey.  She was so excited to see our family.  When we hugged each other both of us just wept.  I have regrets that we have not had the opportunity for deeper discussions about life, family and faith and I hope and pray that we can at some point.  On the day that we left Salatiga two years ago, a special couple came to our house to see us off.  It was our old neighborhood leader and his wife.  We lived in a house in their neighborhood when Ryan was a newborn and Niko was born in that house.  They have two daughters.  One is married now and has a daughter of her own.  The other just graduated from college and is looking for a job.   Casey went to the door and surprised them.  We didn’t have their phone number, so just had to stop by.  J  They were so surprised to see us.   The wife gave me a warm handshake and kissed each cheek as you do here---but then, she really hugged me.   We don’t have the same religious beliefs or follow the same traditions, but the love they have for our family was really evident and was such a blessing to our hearts. 

When I was telling my friend about how tired I was from visiting friends (we haven’t even made it to see everyone yet, even after two visits!), she said she felt sorry for me.  Then she said that she was also not sorry—because it demonstrates how much we are loved and how many people care about us.  Although we don’t have a ministry at the same place anymore, those people have been a big part of our lives.  We have a new ministry now and new people to get to know.  I am sure that as we work here longer, we will get to know them better and develop deeper relationships.  Right now we still feel a little torn, feeling like we are a part of two worlds.  At this moment, we do give thanks for all the amazing opportunities He has given us and for all the people He has brought into our lives ALL around the world.  We are certainly blessed!